Saturday, December 5, 2009

Thanksgiving Thoughts

A BIG thank you goes out to Paul Krysik for giving me the beginning and ending quotes of this entry.
“Anticipate the difficult by managing the easy” ~Lao Tzu

I know what ur thinking. I'm late. Okay, so it's no coincidence my watch broke in October. Time almost literally doesn't exist in Prague. Ppl say, "meet me in a couple of hours" and it could really mean a couple of hours, a half hour or two days from now. It just doesn't matter to them! Maybe it's just a European thing?

Here’s an update on school: Even though I feel like I may have chosen the wrong program, this program has really helped me begin to believe in MYSELF u know? I think that Prague was pulling me and, like Hana said to me recently, “I wanted a little more culture shock than just going to a place where everyone spoke the same language as me.” It's really pushing my limits as far as just knowing that I'm good on my own and I'm finding more and more that I CAN believe in myself, which is a great thing to take from a program all the teachers are so worried about us all coming away with something and it's a little frustrating cuz like they each say to me (in their own way) "You're a great actress. why aren't you getting cast?" But I am getting cast. Maybe not in everything, but I am. So...what can I say? You’ve got a program that’s really new and some people are just not going to fit into the parts that are being written. I’m learning new techniques and that’s what I came her for: to learn. I'm going back to NYC where I can hang with my beautiful, talented and FANTASTIC friend Cullen and we can make our own movies with Kyle and Julia and any number of the spontaneous, honest, loving friends I’ve somehow convinced to be my friends back home (hahaha, u know I’m kidding. I just paid you all off). I'll be just fine and your program will be too, I hope! I do truly wish the best for this program because I think it’s necessary, especially for theater actors!!!!!

I pulled out the stone in my bag a couple days ago. It’s engraved, “Dream.” I need to remember that I deliberately put that in my bag to remind me to DO. IT. And often. As my dad says, “living is learning and that is the truest thing i know!” I don’t ever want to stop dreaming and I DO NOT want to EVER stop dreaming!

I realized recently that my gift is Joy and I am so thankful for that. I don't know where it started or formed, but it MIGHT have to do with that Hebrew name of mine...Chava Brecha (Joyous Blessing).

“I mean, no matter where you are, no matter what has ever happened, no matter how things may appear, every single moment of every single day, you're being drawn closer than you've ever been before, to getting everything you've ever wanted.” TUT

This is the real secret of life - to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play. (from paul k’s fb pg)

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